Part One: Self-Esteem

I've decided to do a two part series on self-esteem in young women. I want to mainly concentrate on teenage girls in high school, but I want to talk about younger girls and women my age, as well as older generations.

I'm too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall. I'm too big, too small, too loud, too shy. My hair is too straight, too curly, too short, too long. My clothes are never good enough. I'm never good enough.
Does any of this sound even a little bit familiar? It does to me. In fact, it sounds like a lot of women I know. Everyone goes through periods of time where they feel self conscious or their esteem is a little low, that's a pretty normal feeling, especially when your a teenager. The question is; When does it stop being a 'normal' thing, and start being something parents/teachers/friends should worry about?
Self-esteem is extremely important because it can affect how someone acts, how easily they make friends and how they control their behaviour. Most teenagers have a hard time with their self-esteem because, as they go through puberty, their bodies and the way they think changes. Most teens (and adults) compare themselves to others, whether it be strangers, friends or celebrities. The problem with comparing yourself to others, especially as a teen is that everyone matures differently. Some girls get nervous and uncomfortable about the way they develop, others wish they'd mature sooner. Boys can feel pressure to look like certain celebrities, or to have bigger muscles.
As parents/teachers/family/friends of young girls and teenagers, how do we help them feel better about themselves?
Even though my mental image of myself sucks, I try my best to keep that from Alexis. I only weigh myself if she's out of the room, or downstairs, I try not to use words like fat or skinny in front of her. Jeff and I try to teach her about being healthy, not about being skinny. This morning when she was getting dressed in her room, I looked out of the bathroom and saw that she was standing in front of her mirror, she had her shirt lifted up and was turning from side to side sucking in her stomach. I heard her say "I'm fat". I asked her what she said, and she looked up at me and said "Mom, am I fat?". I was shocked. I've never heard her talk like that before about anyone, let alone herself. I went into her room and sat her down on the bed with me, and this is what I said;
"Alexis, we don't use words like that in this house. Being fat or skinny isn't important. What's important is that your healthy. You eat healthy foods, we go out and exercise everyday. We take walks with Harvey, bike rides with friends and we even go hiking at Barry's. Do you eat healthy? (She said yes) Do you feel healthy and strong? (Yes) Do we go out and get our exercise? (Yes) Then that's all you ever have to worry about. If you take care of your body by exercising, and take care of your brain by eating properly, they will take care of you."
She seemed OK after that, but I'm still shell shocked. I don't know if what I said helped her any, I can only pray, but it made me stop and think about self-esteem and at what age your self-esteem starts being affected by your body-image.

Tomorrow: Part Two - Body Image

Friday Weigh-In
Last Weeks Weight: 272
This Weeks Weight: 269 (3lbs)
Total Weight Loss: 11lbs (woot!)